Has anyone ever peed on your car? It’s a very violating kind of feeling. I can understand why dogs pee to mark their territory. Who wants to go near someone else’s urine?
Here’s how the story unfolded. The hubby and I went for a walk this evening with our dog, Jackson. When we opened the door Jon commented that our door smelled like pee. As we were walking into our driveway after our stroll, we noticed there was a liquid stain all across the back of my car. Once we were a step away, you could smell the urine. I asked Jon just to make sure, and he replied, “I’ve worked in a nursing home before, I know what piss smells like.” He peered a little closer to the back glass and noticed there were two spit stains.
When something like that happens a wave of suspects runs through your head. I didn’t have a very long stream at all. I mean I’m tutoring in the town of my former school, but I wouldn’t think that any of my students would be so vile. Plus, there was a sample on the side door of our house as well. But who would do such a thing? It’s hard to fathom that a complete stranger would pee on my car.
Needless to say, the husband was not thrilled. Without hesitation he took my vehicle to the wash and removed the evidence. For some reason I wasn’t totally unnerved, just pensive. It wasn’t the first time I had bodily fluids on a car – don’t get ahead of yourself. In college I had a few friends who puked outside of the window. I guess it’s one thing when you know who is dispensing the expelled liquids.
At one time my car was broken into – they busted through the sunroof, went through my glove compartment and console, ripped out the radio, and broke a tool in the ignition when they tried to actually steal the Honda Civic. I had never felt more violated. To this day I have no idea who ravaged my car. I may never know who now peed on it. Our neighbors said they may have a few suspects, though.
I do know this. I may not be that worried because I do believe in karma. I also like the philosophy that it should be an eye for an eye and a piss for a piss. If it is some neighborhood punk who peed on my car I think the only fair punishment would be to let me pee on his bicycle. I’ll make sure to eat lots of asparagus beforehand.
